The Condiment Calamity by Chloe Khayat

This past Saturday, I took a much-needed break from the stress of college applications to go to the Cleveland Guardians game against the Baltimore Orioles. I accompanied my good friend Caroline and her family as we headed downtown. During the game, I kept a sure eye on the jumbotron, hoping to finally get featured. However, I quickly came to regret watching it when I witnessed one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen. Broadcasted on the big screen was a man holding a wooden spoon and an unnecessarily large tub of mustard. I watched as he began shoveling spoonfuls of the mustard into his mouth. I have a weird thing about condiments, so this was especially hard to watch.

Surprisingly, my appetite remained after this, so Caroline and I went to get soft pretzels. I devoured the greasy, salty stadium delicacy in a matter of minutes. However, my food risked a reappearance when the mustard man came back on the jumbotron. I watched him ask the man sitting next to him to hold a hot dog for him so that he could put mustard on the bun. He then proceeded to ignore the hotdog and just eat the mustard-drenched bun. (I spared you from seeing this image and chose a panorama I took at the game instead).

This series of events was almost enough to take my mind off the fact that the Guardians were losing the game. While we did manage to get a home run, we lost the game five to one.

4 thoughts on “The Condiment Calamity by Chloe Khayat

  1. Something about watching people eat gives me a bit of the ick. If I had seen this man on the jumbotron, it would have been completely over for me.

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