My Halloween Costume: An Explanation by Gabbi Fortin

I must say, Halloween this year was extremely underwhelming, at least for me. I forgot it was Halloween until my zero period weight training class’ workout was festively Halloween themed. That morning I packed a simple yellow pencil skirt, a long sleeved gray shirt and Vans, and when I finished changing, I kicked myself for not even packing eyeliner to draw a spider web on my cheek. However, I quickly came up with an explanation for my ‘costume’:

Jessica is fresh out of Ohio University, and wore this outfit to her first job interview. Unfortunately, she didn’t get the job- she didn’t wear a blazer, she didn’t have heels or stockings on, and her hair was a mess. To make matters worse, her hand shake is overly aggressive. 

In the end, Jessica not getting her dream job as HR at Stein & Sons turned out to be a blessing in a curse. After the interview, she saw a post from her ex-best friend who was living her best life traveling abroad all over South America. This post prompted a total quarter life crisis. What was she doing with her life? The only HR experience she had was solving disputes between her sisters in Delta Delta Delta, and even then she’d complain about how petty they were being to her roommates. 

Intent on finding something meaningful to do with her life, she found an organization that lets you teach students English in a third world country, all expenses paid. Whether or not Jessica applied because she actually wanted to help people is irrelevant. She applied and got in! She spent a full year in Sri Lanka, and n

ow spends her time working as PR (not HR) for Upton Hudson law. 

She now takes every opportunity to talk about the fact that she spent a year in Sri Lanka, and how bad the conditions are for the children, while drinking her venti vanilla iced latte with coconut milk from Starbucks. 

So while you may think that I did not dress up for Halloween, I actually did!

The Radio by Kevin Jiang

I’m an obsessive sports fan, with a few odd habits. For example, I watch most Indians, Cavaliers, and Browns games on TV… on mute. I’ve always found TV announcers to be too minimalist, and radio personalities to be much more exciting. On TV, I watch a baseball fly over the wall and think, “oh, that baseball just went over the wall for a home run.” But on the radio, “that ball is waaaay back there, and gone!” Much more exciting! So, as a tribute to the many calls I’ve heard over the years, here’s my favorite call for each Cleveland radio announcer:

Tom Hamilton, Cleveland Indians: Tyler Naquin’s Walk-Off Inside-the-Park Home Run

Many Indians fans would choose Rajai Davis’ home run in Game 7 of the 2016 World Series here, but in my opinion, it was just like any other Tom Hamilton home run call. The only difference was the moment in which the call was made, which I do not believe should have any bearing on anyone’s judgement of the call. Naquin’s inside-the-parker was truly special due to Hamilton needing to keep up the energy and suspense during Naquin’s trip around the bases; nobody knew whether Naquin would actually make it until he dove headfirst into home plate.

John Michael, Cleveland Cavaliers: The Shot, Kyrie Irving

I went back and listened to all of my memorable moment selections again (no, they are unfortunately not seared into my memory), and the urgency of Michael’s voice is palpable. Additionally, I have always enjoyed Michael’s running commentary in the most intense moments. Michael might always seem a half-second behind, but the lag just works to provide an eerie sensation that is soothingly suspenseful. While other announcers on this list might be rendered speechless after a major moment, Michael’s excitement always shines through.

This season, Michael has been replaced by Tim Alcorn as he transitions to the TV booth following the death of Fred McLeod. I haven’t heard much of Alcorn yet, but his accidentally calling the Celtics’ Brad Wannamaker “Brad Wannabe” tops the list so far.

Jim Donovan, Cleveland Browns: “Chubba Wubba Hubb!”

To be honest, I had no idea how to spell out this call, which in a way gives insight into its spontaneity. Unlike the other calls on this list, Donovan did not use any of his trademark lines in an unexpected moment, rather opting for a line made up in the moment. This gives Donovan’s call a sense of authenticity unseen in other calls. On another note, when watching replays I noticed that Donovan is the only announcer who stands when working the game. The man has some iconic hand gestures.

No Nemo? No Problem by Lane Murray

I’ve never seen Finding Nemo! I know, crazy! Zero part of me has avoided this supposedly beloved film in any way, but for some reason I’ve never sat down and watched this movie. I’ve seen clips on the Internet of that little girl in the pink shirt and I know that the general plot involves Nemo, the titular fish, getting lost from his father and what entails because of this. At this point I’m not quite sure that I ever need to watch Finding Nemo. I mean, did I ever really NEED to watch it in the first place? There’s hundreds of quality Disney and Pixar films that follow plot arches spread so thin they’re recognizable by children, so why Nemo? Why is everyone so obsessed with this movie? Maybe I’d understand if I were to watch it, however, I doubt I would finish with a complete appreciation after all this time. If I were to watch it I would 100% go in as open-minded as possible, but I feel like some resentment toward this film has grown inside me after years of the same conversation over and over again. The one where people make references to the movie and when I have literally no reaction they go, “Wait….. Have you NOT seen Finding Nemo?!?!?!?!” I resent this conversation so much I would consider watching the movie just so I never have to have it again. Of course this isn’t a bad idea because then not only would I be more well-versed in pop culture and whatnot, but I know I would probably enjoy the film as well. Alternatively, I could always just lie and say that I have in fact seen it, but I’m honestly too lazy to look up a summary because if I’m going to lie I have to do it well, so that’s not an option. I really do know that my best option is to just watch the movie, but I think I might just continue to live in my small bubble of Nemo denial, it’s quite nice here.

The Highs and Lows of Fantasy Football by John Stevenson

This NFL season has been crazy, disappointing, and exciting, all at the same time.  For my fantasy football team it has been an absolute rollercoaster, as I am currently participating in a 20 team league that has proven to be very competitive.  At the beginning of our season we had a draft lottery to determine our picks, and I was given the 7th pick as it is very desirable. For my first pick I selected Le’Veon Bell, an experienced running back who just joined the New York Jets in free agency.  Then in the second round I selected The Philadelphia Eagles tight end Zach Ertz because he holds the record for most receptions in a season by a tight end, so he is bound to score points. In the third round I picked the Chargers backup running back Austin Ekler because the starter Melvin Gordon was participating in a contract holdout.  At the end of the draft I had a very solid team as I was projected to score the most points in the league.

          Before I knew it, the season started and for the first two weeks my team scored the most points in the league as I absolutely destroyed my opponents.  Week three was a huge disappointment as my team underperformed and in result, lost. That week I made a decision, I had to trade Austin Ekler because I predicted that the starter, Melvin Gordon, was going to come back from his holdout that week. I traded him for the injured Saquon Barkley, who was the best running back in the league before his injury.  Amazingly, two hours after my trade Melvin Gordon announced that his holdout would end, and at that moment I felt like the luckiest man in the world.

        I basically had a whole new team after that trade, as Ekler was my star player.  The next 4 weeks would be very tough as I lost 4 games in a row because Saquon Barkley was still injured and on my bench.  These losses were heartbreaking as I lost by 5, .5, 1.8, and 4 points. I felt like my season was over, but out of nowhere Sawuon Barkley announced that he would return from his injury to play against the Arizona Cardinals and I was ecstatic. I would finally end up winning and my record would improve to 3-5.  I still believe in my team, and I can still make a playoff push even though my colleagues in the league heavily disagree. Trash talk has become a huge part of my league, and I probably do the most of it, which is why I hear a storm from everyone else when I lose. All in all, fantasy football has been a blast this year thus far, and I definitely recommend it to everyone that watches football.

College Essay Reflections by Aaliyah Williams

I cannot describe a more tedious process than perfecting my college essay. I have somewhere between five and eight drafts of the same essay saved in Google Docs (labelled things like Draft(s) 1-5, Draft 1.1, Draft with ____ ‘s comments, Draft with _____’ s comments, and etc.), and five different people have seen and given feedback on different drafts, not including my mother or myself. My first draft was written in August of 2019, and it was honestly kind of gross. It read like a cringy YA novel written by a 14-year-old, which raised my total of unusable college essays up to five. 

College essays are the freaking worst for a variety of reasons, but mostly because it’s so hard to hit the gold mine of “just right.” You’re supposed to be confident, but never cocky; witty, but not snarky; sentimental, but under no circumstances sappy; and you should never explain anything, but show what you mean in your phrasing, diction choices, metaphors, and imagery. A narrative miracle is what you’re going for, and people that can write astounding essays like this can get into any school they please.

What I didn’t realize though about writing all these essays, and rewriting the same essay about the same memory, was that the process cemented a memory that could have easily faded away with time. I remember where my friends and I sat in the theater, I remember our crying and sniffling, I remember how we couldn’t really find the words to express how much we’d miss each other, and even remember the tacos I ordered at Barrio after the movie. Having this memory forever in writing is comforting, as I know how unreliable human memory really can be.

My essay ended up being just what it was supposed to be: not some kind of literary masterpiece like I’d dreamt of writing, not something that was a tear-jerker or even something especially memorable. It was, however, a thoughtful and concise narrative about one of my most notable memories that I’ve made with my friends, and writing about it over and over (and over and over and over) helped to solidify the memory forever. And if when I’m old and decrepit the memory begins to turn fuzzy, I can always go back to my essay and relive it.

Who’s That? By Victoria Helmick

Ah, it is a peaceful Wednesday night, I have finished all of my homework and ate dinner with my family. 

The clock strikes 8 P.M. and everyone in the house rushes to the television. 

We gather our snacks, blankets, and even our little dog Lola, as we are ready to be mesmerized by what’s to come. 

BAM!

The opening music begins and we are immersed in the fantastic and crazy confusing world of The Masked Singer. 

I cannot tell you how we stumbled upon this ridiculous show, but for the past year, every Wednesday night, it has been a tradition in my house to watch this show together. The premise of the show is to guess who is behind the mask of the performer. There are four famous judges who critique each performer including, Jenny McCarthy, Ken Jeong, Robin Thicke, and Nicole Scherzinger. The show starts with Nick Cannon, the host, welcoming viewers and introducing all 16 of the performers to come. Under each mask could be any type of celebrity from an Academy Award-winning actor to a well known Grammy-winning artist. The performers are introduced with each wearing their own unique and extravagant costume covering their body from head to toe. No one, including Nick Cannon, the judges, the audience, and each separate performer, knows who is under each mask. Each performer then is personally introduced through a video that has challenging clues about their life showing viewers hints to who might be under the mask. 

After each singing performance, we yell at the television, and at each other, arguing with the judges on who might be under the mask. We have ranged guesses from the famous drag queen, RuPaul, to Lebron James. It is a brain teaser trying to figure out who it is. The judges then input their guesses and the audience reacts with “oooos” and “ahhhhs.” The performer then leaves the stage and waits for the results. Another performer does the same routine, and then the audience chooses the performance they liked better. When the results of the voting are announced, the winner continues to battle against winners of other groups. While the loser battles against another loser to reclaim their ticket to the next competition. At the end, when the loser in the life or death competition is announced, they are ultimately “unmasked”, and revealed to the public who is behind the mask. 

The Masked Singer consists of many cliff hangers, tear-jerkers, and thrilling performances. Some contestants perform on this show to escape reality and show the world who they truly are. Celebrities are given the chance to show the world that regardless of what they are known for, they do have talent under the mask that they show the public eye.

Things to Write About by Tomasina DeLong

I have already written most of my college essays, but as I look back on when I first started this process over a year ago I had no idea where to begin. The first and most common response when someone has to write a college essay is, “There isn’t anything interesting about me and I don’t have anything to write about.” I have some pieces of advice when getting started: just start writing. Later in the writing process, you will want to write with an intended purpose in mind, but when just getting started it is okay to write without one. You may be in your head, but you need to just start writing because without an essay written you won’t have anything to polish or revise. You also don’t need to have experienced something traumatic in order to write a good essay. Often, essays about losing a family member or moving schools are cliche and that is something you should avoid like the plague {haha get it because “avoid it like the plague” is a cliche} Sometimes starting with one of the common app prompts can be difficult because they are so open-ended, but there are also other college essay prompts that provide more direction. These essay prompts are usually supplemental so they might tell less about you than a common app essay would. However, these prompts serve as great starting points. Some possible essay prompts to get you thinking are:

  1.  A hot dog might be a sandwich, and cereal might be a soup, but is a ______ a ______?
  2. Cats have nine lives, Pac-Man has 3 lives, and radioactive isotopes have half-lives. How many lives does something else—conceptual or actual—have, and why?
  3. Think back to a situation in your life where you had to decide between taking a risk and playing it safe. Which choice did you make? What was the outcome of your choice? Would you have made the same decision looking back on the experience or would you have made a different decision?
  4. Where’s Waldo?
  5. What is your theme song?
  6. What’s so odd about odd numbers?
  7. Little pigs, French hens, a family of bears. Blind mice, musketeers, the Fates. Parts of an atom, laws of thought, a guideline for composition. Omne trium perfectum? Create your own group of three, and describe why and how they fit together.

What is Wrong with the Browns? (Part 2) By Isaiah Gundani

In the last iteration of “What is Wrong with the Browns?”, I caught up with the team right after their gut-wrenching loss to the Rams. (A game in which Baker Mayfield threw an interception at the 5 yard line with an opportunity to tie the game.) Following this loss, the Browns traveled to Baltimore to face a hot Ravens team. In my last blog post, I challenged the Browns to defeat the Ravens and move to 2-2 on the season, which is what they successfully did. Since this win, the Browns have looked like utter garbage, losing 3 consecutive games. The first loss came in embarrassing fashion as the Browns lost 31-3 against the San Francisco 49ers on Monday Night Football. The second loss came at home to the Seattle Seahawks, during which the browns blew a 20-6 lead. I would say I was surprised by this defeat, but I have seen crazier in my time as a Cleveland sports fan. The last defeat came against the New England Patriots, which saw the Browns turn the ball over on 3 consecutive plays. This prompted me to turn off the game and throw the remote across the room. Anyways… the Browns aren’t entirely to blame for these losses as they played arguably the best 3 teams in the league. Despite this, I expected the Browns to show more discipline in these games, and not allow penalties, turnovers, and bad play-calling to be the deciding factor.Image result for brows vs patriots 10 28 19"

Although these last few games have been brutal, there is some hope for the Browns. Their schedule for the rest of the year is one of the easiest in the league. This easy schedule starts today against the 2-6 Denver Broncos (who happen to be missing their starting quarterback). If the browns don’t win today, I could see some changes in the coaching staff ensuing. This would be a shame as the Browns’ Head Coach, Freddie Kitchens, recently moved to Shaker. He better step up his play-calling today or he could be leaving Shaker very soon.

 

 

The Best Album of All Time by Emma Jevack

Show Stopping. Mind blowing. Grammy Award winning. All of these are true of Kacey Musgraves’ album Golden Hour. This is her third album, with the previous two being heavily geared towards fun country music. However Golden Hour stands out as an indie/country/pop fusion, creating a trifecta that I didn’t know I was missing in my life. Each song is emotional and thought-provoking, either evoking a feeling of extreme joy and happiness or leaving you to want to cry for the next 30 minutes. This spectrum of not only emotional lyrics, but expertly written music, is the reason Kacey not only swept the 2019 Grammys, but won the coveted Album of the Year award. This album sparked a bigger following for her, and she even played at Coachella. This album is so successful because everyone can find a song to enjoy and relate to. My personal favorites are Lonely Weekend, Space Cowboy, Slow Burn, Love is a Wild Thing, High– I just realized I’m listing the entire album because litterally every song on it is a masterpiece! Even if you don’t like “country music” I promise you will love at least one of these songs, but I can’t promise that you won’t listen to it nonstop and become obsessed with the icon that is Kacey Musgraves.

songs by emilia richter

A song that reminds me of my childhood is… well I’m really not sure. I can only think of little nursery rhymes and kid’s songs and that kind of thing. The kind of songs that come with a sing-along book and a CD and crayons. Or the kind that are supposed to teach you how to read. I don’t know the names of those songs. I barely even remember how they go.

Sometimes I hear a song and it is overwhelming. I am overwhelmed with emotion because memories hit me so suddenly. I feel like I have been transported back to a different time of my life, and I feel just how I did back then. 

Lots of times, I hear a song and for some reason my brain has associated it with a person. Sometimes the songs makes me feel happy, because I am friends with that person and I am excited to see them again. Other times, the song reminds me of someone who I don’t talk to anymore. There are too many of those. It’s unfortunate because all of the songs are good. I love those songs. But they are tainted by association. I introduced that song to someone, or we listened to it together, or we both were obsessed with it. So when I hear a song like that, I feel sad because of the loss, angry because of what happened, and hopeless because there’s nothing I can do. 

Sometimes I hear a song and it makes me want to go to sleep. Or fall in love or get married or just sit there and do nothing at all. Some songs make me get up and dance all on my own. Some make me cry and some make me think. And lots of them make me want to write songs.

I really want to write songs. I have tried writing some. I don’t know if they are any good!! I guess there’s no way to objectively say if something is good or bad, beautiful or tasteless. It all depends, right? And there are tons of artists writing whole albums with one computer and zero instruments.